President-Elect Keaton Unveils His Cabinet: Welcome Team ASS-Backwards ! (Part I)

President-Elect Keaton, or Buster as he prefers to be called, has named one half of his cabinet. "I am proud to introduce the first members of Team ASS-Backwards (short for America's Simple Solutions-Backwards) to the nation. Together I know we can get America back on the  right track!"Here are Buster's hand-picked selections:Vice-President: Roscoe "Fatty" ArbuckleRoscoe has always supported Buster in more ways than one. Buster has full confidence...

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Stars Who Scare Me! A Halloween Tribute

I love the stars, I really  do, but there are those few who have always scared me. There is something about them that starts the negative vibes vibrating. This is not a comment on their dramatic skills or their star status. I realize that they have many fans and I do not disparage them. But, for some crazy reason or other, they scare the bejeezus out of me!Working my way through the decades, here are the scary seven:Max SchrekI realize that...

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President-Elect Keaton's 5-Point Program to Save America!

President-Elect Keaton would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone who voted for him. He knows, with your help, that he and the Deadpan Proletariat can fix everything that is broken in our great Nation.  His philosophy is: simple is best. So, no more voluminous bills and laws that no one understands! Buster says it's time to cut through the you-know-what get down to brass tacks! He believes that the future...

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Clara Bow: I Want to Be Happy

Now you know I love the stars and like to have fun with them, but I can only gush about Clara Bow. Forgive me for being a little serious, but our Clara deserves respect!A silent film viewer's response to Clara Bow is immediate and emotional. She, more than any other performer of the silent era, represents raw emotion. There is joy in her presence. She is young, healthy and full of fun, and really, really pretty. She has magical star quality....

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Theda Bara: What I Learned From My Jenny Craig Consultant

Theda checking in here.Yes - I admit I was a little out of shape. I looked into the mirror one day and I was not especially pleased with what I saw..Things were starting to expand, if you know what I mean. It was most distressing!It is not easy being a Vamp. Vamping consists mainly of lounging about in revealing outfits and forcing my victim to stare into my eyes before I reduce him to a pile of mush. It does not leave much time for cardio training....

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