Norma Desmond & Lina Lamont: Silent Sweeties on the Town!

Your intrepid Hollywood reporter Dora Bailey here reporting on the latest sightings in tinsel town!

What 2 silent sweeties have become BFFs and have formed what some might call an unholy alliance? Our sources tell us that former greats and current cougars Norma Desmond and Lina Lamont (you remember them, don’t you?) are joining forces and are planning to stage a double-pronged comeback.

Word on the boulevard is that Norma is penning an epic version of “Salome” for CB DeMille's eyes only, while Lina is angling for a star turn as Marie Antoinette. Norma and Lina have been spotted together around town shopping and lunching, always with their precious little heads together in a conspiratorial huddle. Norma has stormed the gates of Paramount and Lina as been sniffing around MGM (that other Norma better watch out).

Lina Lamont: longing to tell them to eat cake

Norma as Salome: is that a studio
exec's head on that platter?

Can the ladies make a comeback? We hear that Norma hates that word and prefers “return, but no matter how you word it, the question remains: will the movie-going pubic will take these 2 former divas of silent emotion back into their hearts? After all, it is a new world. 

Lina & Norma face their fears

Talkies Ain't For Sissies

The boys and girls of today's silver screen not only have to act, but speak, as well. Our sources confirm that Norma has an excellent speaking voice. Her challenge will be to shed the drama queen image of the silent era. Fans today like their stars more down to earth. Word is that our Miss Norma actually believed all of that publicity (can you imagine?). But, we hear she has a younger writer helping her whip that "Salome" script into shape. Let's hope he can steer La Desmond into modern times.

Norma and her writer work on the script.

Lina's voice may be more problematical and maybe, just maybe, the role of Marie Antoinette might not be the right return vehicle for her (especially if it is a musical). True, she looks gorgeous in period costumes, but unless Marie was born in the Bowery, it might be hard for the public to accept her as the French queen of opulence. And since the collapse of Monumental Pictures, Lina may have some difficulty finding another studio to call home.

Lina works the MGM executives and angles for a good part

Our humble suggestions:

Norma: Darling, try to remember that you are an actress first and a star second and maybe you and that script writer if yours can convince Paramount to take a chance on you.

Lina: Honey, your fortune may well rest in comedy. There can never be enough zany blondes and we all know that you can take a pie in the kisser!

All we can say is – good luck ladies and we who once worshiped you wish you the greatest success! We'll be watching. Until next time, this is Dora Bailey from the streets of Tinsel Town!

Paramount & MGM: Watch out!

" I caaaaaaaaaaaaaan't wait to see my new movie!!"

* For those who still hold Lina Lamont dear to their heart, her fan club is still out there, refusing to let her be forgotten. For more info, click here.

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The Lina Lamont Fan Club: We Will Not Rest!

Greetings from the Lina Lamont Fan Club!

Yes, loyal fans, we are still here. No matter how hard her enemies try to destroy her legacy, Lina Lamont's fans will not rest until the truth is known and Lina is awarded her proper place in the history of film.

He could too talk!

Just as John Gilbert's legacy was harmed by those who sought to destroy him, Lina's reputation has suffered. For those not familiar with Mr. Gilbert, he was a huge star whose career was destroyed when his enemies made his perfectly adequate voice seem inadequate when talkies changed movies forever. Once the great lover of Greta Garbo, Gilbert made powerful enemies and - poof! -  bad sound, bad scripts, good-bye. Garbo, on the other hand, had scripts tailor-made to her vocal abilities and the best directors, sets, co-stars and costumes. Funny how that happened.

Lina's story is not unlike that of John Gilbert. From 1923 - 1929, Lina Lamont was Monumental Pictures biggest and brightest star. Women copied her and men longer for her. She especially excelled in historical romances and, once paired with Don Lockwood, was one half of a screen duo that rivaled the aforementioned Garbo and Gilbert. During the height of her popularity, Lina received more fan mail than Swanson and graced the covers of more magazines than Bow and Brooks - put together!

Garbo and Gilbert could not compare to Lockwood and Lamont

Naturally, Lina was Monumental's highest paid star. When talking pictures took over, the "masterminds" (as Norma Desmond called them) saw a way to force Lina to take a giant cut in pay. They did virtually nothing to prepare her for talking pictures, giving her only a few lessons with a half-baked vocal coach. MGM not only gave Garbo time to get up to sound speed, but also waited until they found just the right screenplay for her talkie debut ("Anna Christie"). Poor Lina was forced to transition at the snap of a finger from the silent "The Dueling Cavalier" to "The Dancing Cavalier," which showcased the much lower-paid Lockwood's strengths and set the stage for Kathy Selden, the chippie who was sleeping with the star, to claw her way to the top on Lina's back.

Lina had a perfectly lovely speaking voice that
 was manipulated by Monumental Pictures

Lina was also falsely accused of being a "dumb blonde." Lina was a high school graduate with straight "B"s. Her business savvy was legendary. In fact, Mary Pickford was known to admire Lina's negotiating tactics.  But besides being Monumental's highest paid and most glamorous star, Lina also had a keen, inventive mind. Not many people know this, but Lina Lamont was the real inventor of the internet. 

Lina loved to keep current with the likes of gossip columnist Dora Bailey

Others stole the credit, but those who know Lina's keen interest in electronics and gossip know that she was in the forefront of merging technology with up to the minute information. Even today, the 512 x 512 pixel standard test image is known as a "Lena." Coincidence? We think not.

Fans of fashion know Lina as one of the best dressed stars in Hollywood. Whether it be in a period romance, as in this sumptuous costume from "The Royal Rascal,"

or this chic and modern monkey-fur trimmed jacked, Lina knew how to accessorize and always looked better than any star in the room.

So, here's to you, Lina Lamont. Your fans still love you and will never rest until you have been recognized as the ultimate shimmering, glowing star in the cinema firmament.

Lina and whats-his-name

They have rediscovered Louise Brooks. Now it's time for a Lina Lamont revival!

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